We as humans are very good at meeting our physical needs to ensure that we are fed, clothed, watered and have sheltered. However, we also have emotional and spiritual needs which we tend not to be so great at fulfilling.
When kids are acting up it’s usually because a need is not being met. Whether that be that they’re hungry, tired or cold etc. remember it could also be that an emotional need is not being met.
So next time they’re pushing your buttons remember not only their physical needs but also the emotional ones that are crying out for connection.
While it goes without saying that we all love our children, today’s busy family lifestyle can make it tricky to ensure everyone gets their required dose of Love and Connection. As we bustle through the day, getting everyone ready, out the door to their daily activities then back again for dinner, bed and bath, it can be hard to make time for quality connections. Unfortunately, unmet needs for connection can result in uncooperative behavior.
Connections don’t need to be timed; they just need to be meaningful to your child. Every child has a different level of need for love and connection, different things will go towards filling it.
Some suggestions to their daily activities:
- One-on-One time – this could be date days, special activities for just the two of you or even just a quite chat at bedtime.
- Read them a story
- Play a game
- Be playful – join in their silliness rather than reprimand it
- Develop a ritual – this could be a special way of saying goodbye, a bedtime routine, or a secret handshake.
- Give them praise
- Tell them what you love about them
- Have cuddle time
- Eat meals together
- Have a shared interest or hobby