A child’s “talking back” or “bad attitude” is not indicative of their lack of respect. 

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A child can deeply love and revere their family and simply be expressing their overwhelming feelings or beliefs which would not seem so overwhelming if they felt free to share. 

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When we take attitudes personally, we miss out on the opportunity to grow and to help our children grow. 

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Seeking to understand and empathize sincerely is a vital skill to sustain healthy relationships. 

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When we model how to share our opinions and feelings respectfully, our children learn how to do the same. 

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Learning how to communicate respectfully takes maturity, practice, and a good example. 

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Conscious Communication may look something like this: 

📚Be present! Put down your phone or whatever you’re doing so you can focus. 

📚Breathe slowly. Remind yourself that you are both safe here. 

📚Listen. Truly listen. Objectively. 

📚Look for an unmet need or limiting belief behind the behavior. 

(Behind your child’s and your overwhelm) 

📚Sincerely care. Empathize with their emotions and Validate their experience. 

📚If you feel calm communicate your feelings or opinion clearly without using threats, shame, blame or criticism. 

📚If you don’t feel calm, ask to have some time to think. 

📚Problem solve. (This may mean you change your mind now that you have a better understanding, but it doesn’t mean going against your core values or intuition. Hold your boundary empathetically.) 

📚Reconnect. Find time to be together (Play, read, walk, create a meal or artwork together…. anything your child likes) 

📚Most times connection replaces the need for correction.