Managing kids can be a challenge. Some days keeping the peace while keeping your cool seems impossible. While your own patience may be frayed by angry outbursts, opposition, defiance, arguing, and talking back, it’s during these episodes that you need your patience most. Of course, you feel angry, but what counts is how you handle that.
Your interactions with your child can either be patient, reflective and responsive driven by your goals and values, or reactive, driven by your feelings in the present moment. What will you model for your child?
Here are 6 things to help with having patience in moments of struggle
- Don’t take behavior issues personally. Look at misbehaviors as opportunities to help your child develop.
- Consider your limits and boundaries. Set limits BEFORE you get angry and prevent the situation from escalating and your anger from erupting.
- Be aware of your anger rising. Stop what you are doing and take a deep breath. That breath is your pause button. It’s at this moment you can make the conscious choice to keep calm and remain reflective and responsive and be there for your child.
- Have a mantra. Having a mantra, you can repeat to yourself during trying times can help restore your calm. Choose a mantra that’s meaningful to you and calming for you.
- Wait before discipline. Rather than giving in to your strong feelings and becoming reactive and punitive toward your child, take a ten-minute time out of your own to calm yourself down. Come back when you can have a constructive response to your child and their behavior.
- Practice empathy.
Coach Benjamin Mizrahi. Educator. Learning Specialist. Family Coach. Father. Husband.
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